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IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast


I am a Fertility Survivor.  The kind you enter into treatments hoping you will never be... childless.  After several rounds of IUI and IVF, at some of the leading Fertility Centers, I was told I was no longer a candidate for fertility treatment.  It left me asking myself...

So now what?

For the years that followed, I tried to put myself back together and tell myself I would be OK, but I wasn't.  I was shattered - I felt alone and failed by the whole process and especially, my body.  I yearned for others that felt the pain I felt and someone that could help me navigate a life without a child. 

I didn't find it, so I decide to create it.  

Fast forward to today. I am still childless, but my beliefs about my life have changed.  I decided that I can create meaning and purpose in my life even though I am not a mother.  I've learned to love myself and the body I felt failed me as a woman.

If you've been on this journey, hop on and join me as we create something we were not offered.  Let's create a sisterhood for the bravest women I know.  We brush ourselves off and don't let terms like: Failed, Unexplained, Miscarriage, Not-viable or Advanced Maternal Age define us anymore.  

 

Feb 12, 2025

Infertility and Self-Blame: It’s Time to Let Go of Guilt After IVF and Fertility Treatments Failed

Have you ever found yourself questioning every decision you made on your fertility journey? Wondering if you should have started trying sooner, chosen a different doctor, lost more weight, or pursued another round of IVF? If self-blame has become a constant companion after infertility and failed fertility treatments, you are not alone. So many women who are childless after infertility carry a heavy burden of guilt, believing that somehow, they could have done something differently to change the outcome.

But here’s the truth: infertility was never your fault. You did the best you could with the information, resources, and circumstances you had at the time. Blaming yourself isn’t helping - it’s keeping you stuck. It’s time to stop carrying the weight of guilt and start moving toward a future that feels fulfilling, even without the children you dreamed of.

In This Episode, You’ll Learn:

💔 Why infertility and self-blame go hand in hand—and how to break free from the cycle of guilt
💬 The most common thoughts women have after failed IVF and fertility treatments—and why they aren’t true
🔗 How guilt impacts your relationships, marriage, and self-worth—and how to rebuild confidence
The truth about control—why infertility was never in your hands and why it's time to let go of the illusion that you could have changed the outcome
🌱 How to release self-blame and start moving forward—without the weight of infertility guilt holding you back

You Don’t Have to Stay Stuck in Guilt

If infertility has left you feeling like you failed, it’s time for a new perspective. You are not broken. Your worth is not measured by motherhood. And most importantly—you don’t have to carry this guilt alone.

If you’re ready to move forward and release the blame you’ve been holding onto, I invite you to join me for a free Thrive Call. This is your opportunity to talk about where you are, how self-blame is impacting your life, and what it would feel like to finally let it go. Together, we’ll create a plan to help you take the first step toward a future that feels meaningful, even without the children you longed for.

🔗 Schedule your free call here: Book a Thrive Call

Exciting News!

📖 My book So Now What? launches on April 2nd! I need your help choosing the final back cover design. Head over to my Instagram (@lana.manikowski), check out my latest reels, and vote for your favorite. I’m also giving away signed copies—stay tuned for details on how to enter!

💌 FREE RESOURCE: If you’ve ever struggled with what to say when people make insensitive comments about your childlessness, I have something for you. Download The Top 27 Things People Say When You Are Childless (...and how to respond) for free: Get Your Copy here!

You Are More Than Your Fertility Journey

Infertility and failed fertility treatments may have shaped your past, but they do not define your future. It’s time to release the blame, let go of the guilt, and start embracing the life that is waiting for you.

If this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend who needs to hear it. Your story is not over—it’s just beginning. 💛

🎧 Listen now and take the first step toward healing, self-acceptance, and a future filled with possibility.