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The "So Now What?" Podcast

I am a Fertility Survivor.  The kind you enter into treatments hoping you will never be... childless.  After several rounds of IUI and IVF, at some of the leading Fertility Centers, I was told I was no longer a candidate for fertility treatment.  It left me asking myself...

So now what?

For the years that followed, I tried to put myself back together and tell myself I would be OK, but I wasn't.  I was shattered - I felt alone and failed by the whole process and especially, my body.  I yearned for others that felt the pain I felt and someone that could help me navigate a life without a child. 

I didn't find it, so I decide to create it.  

Fast forward to today. I am still childless, but my beliefs about my life have changed.  I decided that I can create meaning and purpose in my life even though I am not a mother.  I've learned to love myself and the body I felt failed me as a woman.

If you've been on this journey, hop on and join me as we create something we were not offered.  Let's create a sisterhood for the bravest women I know.  We brush ourselves off and don't let terms like: Failed, Unexplained, Miscarriage, Not-viable or Advanced Maternal Age define us anymore.  


Jun 18, 2024

Episode Summary

This week marks my 15th wedding anniversary, a significant milestone that feels both like yesterday and a lifetime ago. Reflecting on our journey, I've decided to discuss marriage and relationships when you find yourself unexpectedly childless. In this episode, I'll uncover the top 10 misconceptions...

Jun 12, 2024

Hello, lovely listeners! I'm so glad you're joining me today. If you haven't already, I invite you to subscribe to my YouTube channel, Lana.Manikowski. Look for my profile picture with a yellow shirt—if you see me in a red shirt, that's an old channel I no longer update. Subscribe to stay connected and catch some...

Jun 4, 2024

Welcome back to another week of The “So Now What?” Podcast! I’m so grateful you're here with me. As we welcome June, it's the perfect time to reflect on the goals and dreams we set for ourselves at the start of the year. Maybe you’re reassessing some plans or realizing that some things didn’t pan out as easily...

May 22, 2024


Hello, beautiful souls! It's Lana Manikowski and I'm thrilled to share some major life updates and inspiring insights with you today. This episode is dedicated to all the incredible women who are not sure what to expect of your life childless after infertility and IVF. It's a journey filled with unexpected...

May 15, 2024

In this episode, we explore the intricate emotions surrounding birthdays if you are childless after infertility. Inspired by recent gatherings celebrating The Other’s Day Brunch, I highlight the complexities of navigating birthdays and offer insights on how to approach them with strength and hope.

Celebrating The...